100 Days IN Review-Insights, Hindsight and New Sights

Weighing Up

The Heavens declare your glory, Oh God
The skies proclaim the works of your hands.

I don't know what my physical weight is, but now  that my 100 Days are up, I wanted to review what I had hoped to gain from this process I felt led to take on, as well as what I plan to move into from here.

In looking back to my hopes, the main theme was to shed the accumulated excess weight of years of not staying as 'on top of things' as I could have. Of course, all the moving around and added burden of a long distance relationship (that brought a whole lot of extra trauma of its own that I won't go into), and the lack of being able to maintain a natural rhythm and routine for healthy habits—although, I really did try repeatedly to establish new ways with each new set up.

The most established habit that has come forth out of this time has definitely been in the area of diet and eating. My thoughts concerning food and what I'm eating are fairly stable, and I am the most healthy and balanced physically and functionally than I have been for literally years.

Overall, on this level, I am pleased with the track I'm on and I intend to stick with it more or less as it is ( 16:8), with perhaps a few softer lines occasionally, such as 15-16 hrs fasting, maybe have some rice or pasta... but not so fussed about that, really. Not like I'm craving anything in particular.

I don't think I progressed as far INTERNALLY as I wanted to, but perhaps that will become evident as we go on.

90/90/1

Today, I learned of a guy called Robin Sharme and he has something he calls the 90/90/1 Rule.
I am moving into this daily challenge now. It seems that the Lord keeps bringing me ways to pull me back in to the simplicity of daily focusing and building— with NEIS, plus my 100 Days, and the Teachable Creator Challenge (which has helped with focus on getting my online school up and running and runs till Aug 31), and now, with this. He just keeps giving me breadcrumbs to follow an they all dovetail and service each other, so it isn't like I'm trying to juggle multiple goals. It's more like each one breaks a specific area down into structured and attainable sections.

With the 90/90/1 Rule the idea is that you spend the next 90 days, spending the first 90 mins on the single biggest game changing opportunity.

For me, hands down, no question, that first 90 mins is going into the Word of God, renewing my mind and establishing my heart. I am desperate to get my head and heart back into healthy places and before you finish reading this blog, you will have a clearer understanding as to why.

BUT, that isn't all. I'm actually doing a double-up on this one. My early morning is going to be in the Word (6:30-8) OR divided between first thing in the morning and last thing at night, and my first 90 mins from 9 will be for my business. I am going to be doing organised bible study. Thematic, topical or by a book at a time. I will know before tomorrow morning where I am going to start with the Word. However, when it comes to my business, whenever I take some time away at my daughter's, or even an interruption, I seem to just lose my place and forget all of everything! I will decide about that before tomorrow, because if I don't know what I'm doing when the day starts, the first half of the day disappears.
To be fair, though, I don't think it is just the time off—

Personal Disclosure

So, here is the very hard part.

It's been so much more difficult because I have been trying to come to grips with my husband wanting a divorce. The 6 months cooling off ends this weekend and with the active divorce date looming, the emotional intensity in me has been escalating. Of course, I was hoping for a better outcome—a change of heart perhaps, but the closing date draws near, I am not in the peaceful place I would like to be. Nor did I want to give up, or  say anything before it was past hope.

My goal, after the 100 Days was that no matter the outcome, I would have peace and be able to accept and move on, only the last few days have felt anything but that. I was even sent home from my part time job on Wednesday and told to take the rest of the week off because I started sobbing and the tears would not stop. The only thing that has helped is listening to really solid Bible teaching.  I know from personal experience that this is the way to freedom and wholeness: immersion in the Word to the exclusion of all else. It's the only way I can keep my thoughts in check and block any unruly gambols down dark lanes that can lead to long term struggles. The fact that I am finding it so hard at all indicates clearly that I've not done enough to keep my mental watch over my heart. I knew that—so, no excuses.

The way out is almost always through.

I still believe what I heard in my heart was from God:
The time for mourning is over. Rejoice!
The Season of singing has come!
These words carry within themselves the power for fulfilment when taken to heart. Any living Word from God encapsulates the life creating force to fulfil it. If I had made an immersive stand on them months ago, rather than a brief reference now and then, chances are my heart would already be experiencing God's peace that passes all understanding. But now, time has run out and I simply have to navigate my way out beyond the sorrow. I think this will be my first area of study...starting in Song Of Songs (one of my favourite books).

So that's my story for now. I thought I would include some of my own brand of WordArt :) My photos and presentation with some good Word texts!
Till next time.

100 Days of Transformation- Day 2-1-Final 24

The man I love <3

Even though I only just got in the door, and it's 9:43 p.m., I didn't want to miss saying something on this final eve of my 100 DAYS.

I was thinking that it finished today, but as I started after sundown on Sunday (Mother's Day), May 12, my 100th Day actually started at sundown this eve and ends at sundown tomorrow. So, my counter is correct. :)

But wow!! It's been such an emotional few days! My husband has been having some difficulties too, and I'm aching that I cannot be present to comfort him. :(

Heart Strings

That personal matter that just keeps plucking away has been intensifying. It has a time sensitivity aspect and with that also counting down its final week, I find myself drawn tight across all my emotions. This does make for a bit of fragility that probably surprises people who might unwittingly scratch the raw surface of my heart. But that is where I am.

Busyness And Business




This compounds the frustration I feel at not making enough progress with my work, due to having to stop at 3 and go out to an external job four nights and Saturday till 1 pm. I have struggled with this balancing act, which I have mentioned before, and it seems that every time I feel like I'm just settling into a rhythm and doing a good job, I get the wind knocked out of my sails. And then , of course, I think Why Bother? 

There has to be a healthy balance in this. And so, I keep plugging away, looking at how to fulfil my business goals, generate some interest and income and free myself of the burden to work nights on something outside my calling and focus, just for the sake of dollars. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful for all it has afforded, but the cost must be weighed, and if it is too high, an adjustment must be made.

I had already determined to give myself August to prayerfully consider this. I just mention it, coz it's been hard going the last few days. I don't have a buffer zone when it comes to time...and that's just not right.

Defiant Art

Sometimes, like today, just because I feel like this, I will ignore everything and do music or art, or write—or all of them.  I spent an early hour journalling (not unusual), and then another adding to this piece of my grand-baby girl, Pearl.

The final 45 mins before leaving, I played through a set list for worship. I selected a bunch of old skool stuff and enjoyed them. I played through that list tonight for the prayer meeting, which I go to straight from my evening shift, and why I wasn't home till late. In addition to that, I've been ripping all my favourite music to my laptop to encourage more singing when I don't have to be writing/creating. I need  to be singing!

It's That Time.
Time to hit the hay, so I can get up early and do another hour of much delayed illustration work

100 Days of Transformation-Days 8-3-A Big Loss

Can You Believe it?

I am stunned that it is actually a full WEEK since I did a blog!
Not for a single second did I forget or fall off the wagon of my 100 Day Fast, but just didn't get to blog.

News of Loss

Healthy Loss

I went to my GP last Tuesday and was able to weigh myself at the same place where I started. To my great joy, I showed a loss of 8.1 kgs! GLORY!!

Granted, it isn't the 15 kg I was aiming for, but I am not done yet and I believe I am well on the path to being whatever the best weight is for me-Hallelujah! Mine is the pleasure of donning items that was too tight and uncomfortable, which are becoming increasingly loose— and I am enjoying it! 

So, that was probably the highlight of the week for me.

Heart Matters

Overall, I seem to do pretty well, but out of nowhere, I will get slammed and feel swamped with sadness over this personal concern. Along with all this other weight, I know it is something that I have been learning to cast upon the Lord, rather than carry myself, as there is nothing physical or natural that I can do to change it. Prayer, worship and thanksgiving are the highest and best option, but too often, I just grab the whole thing, clutch it close and insist on bearing it again. Only to relinquish it once more when I grow too weary to stand it :(

In every other way, through any and all day to day challenges, I am extremely blessed and grateful for the provision of a home, my office, my family, a wonderful church family, work, worship, means to live... and my amazing vintage car, RITA! God is so faithful. <3

Flare Ups

Just as I have these emotional flare ups, this week, I have had a little more bread than previously and I actually can tell the difference in my body for it. I have reason to believe that yeast is part of the issue, more-so than wheat. One thing about cutting something out of your diet for a season (physical or mental), you can tell if there are issues with it when you start partaking of it again.

I haven't had any reactions to anything else being reintroduced. I think bread is o.k. too, but within a certain balance. I am yet to have pasta or rice, quinoa etc. I'm not really in a hurry to, either.

Ongoing Plans

By the time Tuesday night, Day 100, comes around, I expect to have something of a plan or guideline for the remainder of the year. I don't want to simply stop everything I've been doing and start doing all the things I had stopped doing. lol I am sure this season has been for the purpose of establishing better habits and ways of thinking and living. I have an inkling of some things, but not fully clear yet.

1010 2020 Vision

Tipping Point

Future focus in general has been very  strong this week, along with the sense of the unfolding fulfilment of the vision for the rest of 2019 ( Daily Building remember?) and the progressive unveiling of the view into 2020. Next year, my birthday is 10/10/2020 and early this year, I did feel a clear excitement about upcoming clarity for the year 2020, even though I didn't see it then. A confidence that I would have a level of vision and discernment that I have not enjoyed for a long time has been steadily growing.

Learning With Lisa Online

This is the name of the business I began—not that it seems like much of a business at this point. My new e-book How To Have Fun Making Books has been undergoing edits and I have persevered through multiple attempts to craft my mini-course. I am finally drawing closer to actually having something complete! I am shocked at just how distracted and easily diverted I have been and the massive effort it has taken to simply sit back at my desk, pick everything up and start working again, in spite of every internal clog wanting to yield to procrastination! Yes, there are countless disruptions (that is the age in which we live), but even so, the mental discipline to choose the desired gear in which to work has been monumental. ALL part of the Daily Building process, I have no doubt. I will have a strong and sound mind by the end of 2019!

It seems the scales are beginning to slide. Tipping Point. I finally feel like I am getting somewhere! Yay!

An Afterthought
It's just occurred to me that "scales" are a significant symbol for this time. Not that I am a follower of Zodiacs, but it's interesting in bringing up my birthday, the Libran symbol is also scales. But I want to go further than that...scales represent justice, reckoning, balance and reconciliation and I do believe that all these elements are taking place in me, in my life and in my affairs in this season. This also agrees with the becoming debt-free aspect.

It's as if all the claims the devil had on me because I gave him license through my super stupid choices, are all but met and paid. Hallelujah! Aah yes..selah.

100 Days of Transformation-Days 10-9-Final Countdown

9

Days to go! And counting.
I don't know what I am expecting, but I would like to do something celebrational.  Just holding to this decision for the full term is reason enough!

Regardless of whether I see all that I hope to immediately, or not, I have enjoyed some results and  I know I have sown seeds that are going to produce ongoing fruit. For this reason, don't be surprised if I continue to share after the 100 Days. I want any overflow benefits to be traced back to where they began.

A Quick Recap On Focus

In January this year, I felt the Lord impress upon my heart the phrase Daily Building. I took this to heart and was even logging the days. e.g 1/365 etc. The point was not to count the days, but to stay mindful of making the day count. Today is  Day 223/365.

Another extension on this, was to be daily applying myself in the direction of the final goal, which in this case began with getting my online business off the ground. I know the kinds of stops and starts I've struggled with and the scatter gun tactics I've tried not to do, but kept falling prey to.

I feel His admonishment of just keep turning up every day even if you don't think the days have been so fruitful. Keep turning up. Don't quit....He also whispered to my heart that  this year your debt will end and the circumstances around finance will change permanently. At least, this is what I felt I heard. Time will prove me right, or not, but I am carrying this in my heart every day.

I did receive an email this week saying the larger of my two debts will finish in Dec and I was not being charged interest any more! (Seven years!)

It was also in January when I felt the instruction to come home and apply for NEIS came to me.
I did feel encouraged and strengthened and have continually fallen back on what I received in January. That's the whole purpose of Holy Spirit leading :) To encourage and guide.

Burleigh Beach Bubbles (website no longer exists-
new biz site is https://learningwithlisa.online ) 

Accountability

Both NEIS and the 100 Days have been an asset in keeping me accountable and on track-with a daily building mindset. I don't, for a single second, feel I have accomplished a fraction of what I hoped to in this time, and yet, at the same time, given a significant life event that is taking place Aug 27 (Oz dates), a week after I conclude my 100 days, it does seem like a timely closing of one chapter and the opening of a new.

I am at a place of feeling more sure of what I should and what I can no longer, be doing. We are mere finite beings and can only do so much in a day, but with faith in God, focus, commitment, a good plan, and more than anything else...KEEP TURNING UP (consistency), we can get there.

Commitment one way always means exclusivity and denial in others. Clear direction always prompts clear decision making. Not easy, necessarily. But clear. I've been struggling with the 'not easy' part lol.

My 100 Days and especially my NEIS plans, goals and agreements have been an invaluable source for grounding me again and again. My Fast has done a lot to help me change how I was feeling about myself on a physical level and the psychology around that-ugly, unattractive, old before my time, undesirable, has been. Of course this is connected to other things as well, but in a simple, subtle way, taking such a low key committed step, from a primarily spiritual standpoint has just provided God with room to wrought a work of grace in my heart and mind-and maybe my body too. :)

It's not the end of it either. In the next 9 days, I will know how to continue from Aug 20 regarding food menus and eating windows.

I am a Son/Sunflower

And as I have bee doing the work that I have been doing, I realised that I have found the symbol for my logo/brand. I have repeatedly used this beautiful picture, and I just LOVE it!

It also features on the front of my new e-book...very soon to be released! I completed my first draft yesterday, have a few things to tweak, and then, it will be ready to go!

So, I am making progress!!
But-I did not go to my part time job in order to do it.
It wouldn't be where it is, if had only had parts of days to get it done.

This is causing me to consider deeply how I can best fulfil my daily building mandate. The passing of days, indeed weeks, with no worthwhile progress has been adding a lot of stress to my mind along with being out every day- which anyone who knows me knows that is not aligned with my wiring!

I've even advocated that it's no good for anyone's health. God gave us the example of a day of rest. Making  and learning about art, music, writing, is rest for me and it takes TIME. To build my life through these practices is my call, I am SURE of it! God wants glory thru all of them in manifold ways, so people will want to know Him, and I want to bring it!

That's it for now ... Blessings

How I Love You, Lord ( an original worship song)

100 Days of Transformation- Days 15-11-Heading Full Circle

Another Week Bites The Dust!

So, here we are at Friday again!
I've been working on business things this afternoon and laying a plan for tomorrow so that I don't waste any time, but can be super productive!

I call this Time Clock.
It traces the soul's journey on our timeline in the flesh.
(You can click the image to see it full size)

Blogging at night after getting home from work just hasn't been happening, generally, hence the spaces between, but I do think about it every day! lol

This week has been good from the fasting perspective. It was exciting to be able to enjoy a piece of toasted Turkish bread with Vegemite, yesterday! SOOO, yum! My shepherd's pie was also yum and shared with a few others, who also enjoyed it. It didn't really feel like it had been almost three months since I'd eaten red meat!

I do feel I need to continue to be fairly light with it all, though, and am happy to do so.

Feeling Encouraged

I also had an appointment with a physio last Monday, and I must say, I felt SO uplifted by the time we concluded. She was enormously encouraging and congratulated me on my efforts to do something healthy with my body. I did tell her it was more for spiritual reasons but there was hoped for physical benefits as well, and not having the same pain with my ankle and my lower back was definitely one of them!

I had pretty much forgotten about them on the most part, and the physio seemed quite confident that my actions had contributed to that ( unlike the doctor who had referred me and said "You have a lot of things wrong with you!" which, as you might imagine, had the potential for a deep impact on my psyche- coz I didn't hear it as a physical diagnosis.  Hot on the heels of my emotional hurts, it carried quite a nasty sting!

But after time with Emma... I was in a completely different place!

Embarrassing Relief

I left the Physio and headed to my car...it's a very funny short story, that tickled me, so I made a Facebook video. If you want a little chuckle.. press Play


 hee hee...

My Ongoing Quandry

All, this week, I have been seriously deliberating about how to make some changes to my FAR TOO HECTIC routine. I have heard myself saying This is so not me, nor how I want to live for so long, I'm fed up with myself! lol I just have to make a change!

Since I sold up and packed up and started travelling 7 years ago, I have lived at a pace which is so seriously out-of-sync with my wiring and life goal desires, that I have a gut wrenching longing to restore the stillness in my routine. It's unbelievable that it has taken so long for me to come to the point where I can-not because a magical solution has appeared, but because it is simply unacceptable to continue this way when I know it is contrary to all that is good health and productivity for me.

I simply must STOP.

My Solution

In thinking about it, I guess I do have a solution.
All week I have been thinking about the things that matter most to me. I have literally cried over all the creative works I was feeling I could never do because I always had to be doing something else! It's never been my way to live like that, and I am bummed that I let myself get to that at this point in my life.

But, it is being where I am that is leading to a more driven commitment to be fully dedicated to where I truly want to be and the way I always vowed to spend my most precious commodity-time. Of course, all this is in light of where I feel God has called me and His purposes for my time in the flesh  as Helen Ivicevich would say.
And as I say, Don't waste time doing things that keep you from doing what counts.
I have been giving very careful consideration to these two categories of things. They can all be good things ( Just like the list the Apostle Paul gave in Phil 3:3-8 ), but if they are not the specific good things prepared in advance for you, or me ( Eph 2:10), to do, they could well be wasted time, because whilst we give our life's blood to them, we are not giving it where it really should be going.

I just can't bear that thought any more. Something MUST change!

Full Circle
That brings me back to where I started this whole 100 Day thing-remember? To clear the slate and shake off all the dead weight that I had taken on and have been trying to run a good race, whilst carrying. These un-scriptural paradigms and strongholds, afforded access through poor choices, that have had me bound and distanced from my true north, are being shed, along with unwanted kilos.
This song Full Circle is one of my originals. It is still relevant for me :) coz I feel I am coming home  in a new way again. <3

100 Days Of Transformation- Day 17-16-Fun Making BOoks

Sunday Night


I've just been working on my new e-book called How To Have Fun Making Books, but I think I will need to change it to, How I Have Fun Making Books,  because it has had so much more story in it, than instruction.

But then, I teach through story. Maybe I  will make Part I my story, and Part II , the readers'. Good idea! :)

I worked Saturday morning, visited my friend for her birthday in the afternoon and then, came home and just watched a movie! Was very cool. :)

I led worship at Church this morning, lunched with some church ladies and then have been trying to get my head around goals for this week, with big chunks of time carved out of it for

external work, unrelated to my business, and feeling pressed and stressed already about not having enough time to do the work I committed to do.

I am seriously deliberating about asking my work if they would consider giving me 60% of the time, thereby freeing up more and better quality time for me. Also, because this pace is not fruitful where it needs to be and neither is it sustainable as a lifestyle!

It was absolutely a blessing, but just a bit more than I can manage if I am to honour my NEIS contractual agreement and work wholeheartedly on my business.

It is definitely not the 'Bohemian Entrepreneur' lifestyle it needs to be in order to produce exceptional content.                                                                                                                                      Good Bye Week 12 and hello THREE months!

So, yep. I have gone a full twelve weeks without any  vegemite
toast!!! or any red meat. But I am reintroducing both to the menu this week, however, not all the time.

I am continuing the 16:8 fasting: eating ratio and I am happy to see I am noticing the difference in  certain clothing :) I have no idea of weight difference, tho.

It's been weeks since I had much of the severe back or aggravating ankle pain that I was suffering when I started. However, the sinus related stuff has been pretty awful, made much worse by the cold I picked up last week and still producing fairly substantial sinus congestion issues.
BUT...it didn't stop me leading worship! :) Hallelujah!     

Debts Be Gone!
I received a confirmation that a long time debt would end soon!! It was a big one for my son's boutique film school. This was promised by God to me in January. This would be the last year of debt and my financial situation would change permanently. I had another, just over a third as much, and I know that one is going to be gone too!

In the next five months, according to what the Lord spoke to my heart ( if I heard correctly- and it seems on track), this work I'm doing is going to begin to make a big difference in my life. I know it will take diligent effort and I am keen to be 100% on it!

Other Important Issues

Still holding my heart in prayer for personal things. 
Bedtime for me now...have fun dreams!                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     

100 Days of Transformation-Days 22-18-Another Ambush?

Five Days!!

Well, that has to be the longest break between posts! I wanted to blog sooner, but I chose having a proper amount of time, energy and focus rather than a short, shallow word. So, here we are, at the end of another week and heading into a weekend. And this will mark the end of Week 12- but more on that at the other end of the weekend.

Week 11, if you recall, was full of challenges concerning health, finance, emotions and the ongoing tech saga with Microsoft.  Week 12 saw the correction of the $$ situation and the final resolution with Microsoft (after 33 days!) I felt better too. :)

However, it seemed like the natural ambush of last week, became a more intense spiritual one this week. As I've made apparent, I am walking through a difficult transition and one particular person ( with a nasty track record) got wind of it and decided to 'turn the knife' through a couple of my online platforms.

At first, I allowed this to have much to much space in my head and heart, robbing me of sleep and making me physically tremble with the injustice and cruelty of it. Understandable. After the first message, which was just three letters long, I didn't read any of the content. I did report her for harassment and deleted all the comments.

Not reading them was one of the surest way to keep the poison out of my heart. The other way was to pray for her, as I have on many occasions before. And no, I am not setting myself up as some wonderful person for doing that-I just know it's the best way for me to stay free of any root of bitterness.

A Sneak Peek

What this did for me, though, was empowering, because, I view such manifestations as being spirit driven, and I don't mean the Spirit of God! The Bible says that the weapons of our warfare are not carnal ( of flesh and blood), but mighty, to the pulling down of strongholds. ( 2Cor 10:3-5 ) It also says that we wrestle not against flesh and blood and that we should be clothed in the full armour of God, so that we are fully protected and can stand firm in the day of battle, which is against principalities, rulers, authorities, cosmic powers and spiritual forces of evil. This armour includes multiple forms of prayer and proclamation. (Eph 6:10-18). 

In other words, flesh and blood are not our enemy. Even though people avail themselves to be used in this way, there is a much greater force behind it, and as prayers, intercessors and believing saints, we are the only ones that have the power and authority to intervene in such areas. Not because we are any better than anyone else, but because Jesus calls us to and gave us the enabling command to do so.

But what I understand is, that once the devil starts to show his cards, it's a sure sign that you are having an impact. Jesus said The devil comes to steal, kill and destroy Jn 10:10. John also tells us in
I Jn 3:8 the whole reason Jesus came was to destroy the works of the devil.

We are also informed in Jam 3:16 that where jealousy and selfish ambition exists, there will be chaos and every vile practice. Jealousy and selfish ambition stand out as indicators of evil at work, so when you start having people attack you for no reason other than they are jealous, you know there is a vexing spirit antagonising as well.

Others may or may not know about these truths and that's all the more reason to pray rather than being drawn into a reaction by the bait.

A Bit Out There

I realise that some of you reading this, may not have the same perspective on these things as I do, but it is a biblical view, so I stand on it and have seen it bear out in truth on many occasions.

What is so exciting, is that, at this time, when I thought my fast was finally getting close to winding down, I am instead, feeling the call to enter in prayer more deeply and consistently, which in itself is nothing new, but the kind of prayer has broadened to include the Mt 16:16-19 kind. This is a more intense intercessory prayer and it is directly involving the people connected and concerned with the 'matter of my heart'.

This is the best evidence that I am accomplishing something!
And with only 2 and a half weeks to go, I am glad it has brought a sense of increased intensity to go out with a bang and not just conclude with little to show.

When the devil is pressed to show his hand, you know he is getting desperate. And I have had two weeks of aggravations with this week taking a nasty twist. It also brought about a re-connecting where I had put distance, which means it isn't over yet.

I believe the Lord has shown me what I am praying into but I have no detailed idea of what the outcome will look like, I only know I feel a strong call to pray and intercede as I entered my final three weeks.

But God does work all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His good purpose. Rom 8:28

From the Fasting Angle

Yep, continuing the 16:8. A few little changes expected from Sunday eve, which marks the beginning of Week 13.
THREE MONTHS without vegemite toast! Wow!

O by the way, I haven't done much more, but Pearl does have hair now!

And yes, I do take orders! But they ain't cheap! lol